Doug Kessler says parenting is a form of continuous grieving from the time your kids are born. Plus a letter from Mark de Brunner
As a father who has seen both daughters fledge, I felt Zoe Williams’ pain and bafflement as her first son prepares to leave for university (My son is leaving home for university – and my severe denial has surprised me, 17 August).
No one talks about it but, from the moment of birth, parenting is continuous grieving. We mourn the loss of our one-year-old when they turn two. The fun of the early teen years are only partial compensation for never again watching our toddler invent walking. The move away from home is a big one. When it happened to us, I was grateful for all the practice I’d been gifted. But it still hit hard. Bafflingly hard.
Doug Kessler
London