Cruel strangers stare and one asked if my son had been playing in mud

Cruel strangers stare and one asked if my son had been playing in mud Ethan was rushed away as soon as he was born when doctors saw his skin A mum has spoken about her fears over her son’s hairy birthmark which covers the entire side of his face – but says he’s the most popular kid in school. When Abbi Thompson welcomed her second child into the world, Ethan was taken away instantly. Panicked, the now 37-year-old feared her bundle of joy’s life was in danger, especially as no doctors could give her or her husband, Tom, a clear answer. Ethan had a dark brown mark on the left side of his face, which spread across his scalp. At first, it was believed to be a bruise – until specialists at Great Ormond Street Hospital confirmed the diagnosis: congenital melanocytic naevus (CMN). A type of birthmark. While scared about their son’s future, including what other kids would say, Ethan, now 14, has proven they had nothing to worry about. “I worried about whether he’d be able to have a normal life,” said the domestic assistant, from York. “He used to get lots of stares, mostly from adults, who would judge. Once, a man behind the counter at our local shop asked what he’d been up to – and if he’d been playing around in mud. “I had to explain it was a birthmark, and I know he didn’t mean anything by it, but I stormed out of the shop. Another time, I was walking home from primary school with him one day when another child pointed at Ethan. “Before he had a chance to say anything, their parent pulled them away. To me, I thought they were going to say something about his birthmark – but he was actually only interested in Ethan’s yo-yo-toy. “You’re constantly on alert for people to be mean. In school, though, it was a whole different story. All the fears I had about what other kids would say went out the door. “He made so many friends right away, especially at secondary school, where he’s the most popular kid.” Abbi recalls her pregnancy with Ethan being “textbook”. Ethan has a number of birthmarks across his body, ranging from smaller mole-type patches – to larger ones on his chest and the most prominent on his face. CMN is a rare condition that presents as dark and often hairy birthmarks, covering up to 80% of the body. For some people, CMN is more than just a birthmark; the condition can affect body systems beyond the skin, sometimes causing neurological problems and medical complexities, an increased risk of melanoma and, in worst cases, can be fatal. Ethan’s health, as a result, has suffered. Abbi said: “It’s quite scary where it’s placed. It’s quite an extreme case. The marks have grown with him as he's aged, and there are a few new ones. “He has had a few MRIs to check that they’re not growing into the spine or brain, which is a real possibility – and can be life-threatening. But so far, so good. As I can’t really check his body every week anymore, since he’s a teenager, we get photographs taken of his body regularly to determine if there’s any we’d like to monitor. “We then go every six months to a dermatologist to check any changes or anything we’re worried about. He did have a few abnormal marks, so we got them removed and tested to be sure it was all clear. “But there’s this constant worry of them developing into something we should be worried about. His ear is also very sensitive and is something that he cried a lot about as a child; but there’s nothing that can be done there. “And he’s at a high risk of developing cancer, but we make sure he always wears a hat, rash vest and suncream when in the sun. We’re more mindful, but we don’t want him to be put out completely and not enjoy things like other kids do.” To help Ethan feel less alone, the family attend regional gatherings including people also dealing with CMN. It’s also helped Abbi and Tom realise they’re not the only parents going through his battle. Now, Ethan works with the charity Caring Matters Now to educate other kids at school on the condition, using their helpful toolkit to answer any pressing questions, too. The charity, for which he is an ambassador, provides personal and compassionate support for anyone affected by CMN. They raise awareness and visibility of the condition and fund pioneering research to improve understanding, care and treatment. His main goal is to become a footballer. Ethan said: “Going to football has helped me gain a really strong friendship group. It’s also boosted my confidence. I’d love to be a pro footballer one day to show that people with visible differences, like me, can still play on the pitch. “I would also like to do some acting. And if my birthmark is the reason I score roles and goals, then so be it. I want to be the face for any other kids going through a similar situation – the way we look doesn’t define our abilities.”