'Vasectomy at 21 and no regrets': Men on choosing to be childfree

Readers on why they are choosing not to become fathers Wed 29 Jul 2026 at 1:54pm An increasing number of Australian men are choosing to be childfree, and climate change, financial concerns and prioritising adventure are some of the reasons readers shared with us. We heard from child-free men after publishing our story on why more men are turning away from fatherhood. Here is some of what some of them had to say. Financial concerns My choice to be childless is much the same as described in [your] article — fears of passing on my own mental health issues, seeing how having kids impacted my father's life negatively, and barely being able to afford to keep myself afloat, let alone the added cost of kids. My brother had three kids and it's more important to me to be an additional safe adult in those kids' lives. If I had my own kids, I wouldn't be able to dedicate as much time or effort to have a relationship with them. — David (not his real name), 34, Melbourne/Naarm Sign up to the ABC Lifestyle newsletter A hostile world It doesn't feel responsible to have a child in a world where it's actively hostile to children or parents for existing. The world not only has gotten more expensive there is also climate change, political instability, social media, wealth inequality, AI, [and] hostile government to consider. There is nothing anyone can do can change my mind unless I see the world around me change into a more empathetic world. — Jason (not his real name), 26, Adelaide/Tarntanya I think I probably started telling people when I was a very young boy that I didn't want kids as an act of defiance. As I grew into my teens, the big wide world penetrated my psyche: 9/11, the Iraq war, the encroaching gloom of 21st century living and ultimately climate change became important considerations. Was it really responsible to bring a child into this? I have nieces and nephews and they are great, but when spending time with them, that deep primal longing for one of my own simply isn't there. I ask my friends and colleagues about their reasons for having kids and there just never seems to be a compelling enough reason to venture down that path. It feels like whatever society we're currently in is in the death throes of its life. No child should have to live through whatever is coming next. — Steve (not his real name), aged in his 30s, north Queensland Choosing adventure From a young age, I felt having children was not for me. Even my father said I shouldn't have kids. I think he saw an independent side in my nature, which only grew stronger as I got older. As an adult, I have lived a life as an artist and traveller, full of creativity, spontaneity and adventure. It was clear to me that I could only have this life if I remained childfree. Raising children takes a lot of time, money and endless amounts of sacrifice, commitment, love and devotion. Rather than being a bad or less committed parent, I made the choice of not having a family. Because I preferred to remain childfree, that added a major constraint for prospective partners. But even with this, I have no regrets. — Raymond, aged in his 60s, Hobart/Nipaluna I had vasectomy at 21. I do not and have not regretted this decision. I am not huge fan of children. I have been married to a wonderful woman for 30 years who feels the same way as I do. We have lived a carefree and adventurous life and [have had] opportunities that would not be possible for families without big dollars. — Jarod (not his real name), aged in his 50s, Tasmania The stigma of being childfree I have experienced the raising of eyebrows many times as if I have committed a sin or lacking some kind of capability of commitment. At my previous job my manager told me I could be more patient and that I was not because I don't have a child. I get a lot of comments from my friends that compare my dogs to children as if we have them because we can't have children. I have explained to them many times that I love dogs and I would have them regardless of having or not having a child. I think my wife is under more pressure than me since everyone we visit is constantly talking about the magnificent and unique experience of giving birth and raising a child. — Jack (not his real name), 46, Melbourne/Naarm My wife and I are childfree. My decision comes down to finances, patience, and political and environmental factors. I've been asked by other men about my decision, which has had mixed responses of "Good for you" and more judgemental "What's wrong with you?" — Zachary, 36, Brisbane/Meanjin Leaving a legacy My wife and I decided many years ago not to have children. It is not due to money, but time. We both work very long hours, and I have eight staff. Strangely enough though, we do both long to pass something on, to leave a legacy, and are therefore keen to teach young people lessons we think are important. My greatest fear of this choice though is that when I pass away, there will be nothing left of me for my wife physically. There will be money, but no semblance left of me in a child's face. Friends with kids often have some degree of envy when looking at our material assets and the presumption of available time, and we look enviously at the way their kids look at and feel about them, but the truth is we have just as little time as they do. — Rob, 47, Brisbane/Meanjin Thank you to everyone who wrote to us about being childfree. Some comments have been edited for clarity and brevity.